Escape The Fate has Issues.

Oh man.
I honestly did try to review the new Escape The Fate album Issues for realz, although TECHNICALLY I wasn't asked... I was asked for my address so Hype or whatever could send me this album and that craptastic Abandon All Ships shit.
After hearing that one I was not stoked to listen to this, and decided since the request of address wasn't even too nice that I'd just say fuck it.
But then I felt bad, and felt compelled to actually get through this.
And I honestly tried... but can't.
It's shitty.
It's a really really shitty album.
And Escape The Fate actually used to be a guilty pleasure of mine. They have a few really good songs that I still go back and play from time to time, but this new album sounds less post-hardcore and way more straight up gross hard rock. UGH there is NOTHING worse than hard rock. It makes me sick to my stomach to hear.
I got about 4 songs in and couldn't take it anymore.
And since I don't hate them as much as I hate Abandon All Ships I don't want to waste my time ripping into them, instead I'm just saying straight up that it is SHITTY!
And that's that.
Every time I get one review done lately I am asked to do three more.
So here I tried, and the band failed, and I am not going to put anymore pressure on myself than I have to for this 'review'.

not to mention they look like fucking fa.... I won't even say it.


I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

"And may our reproductive organs be taken gently into the warm hands and wanting mouths of your sheep... and by sheep I mean our adoring fans!"

Okay, so I'm going to go all comedysheblogged on your asses right hurr.
For the first time ever I'm reviewing a comedy DVD... Broken Lizard's DVD to be exact.
It's called Broken Lizard Stands Up and it's Live, Extended and Uncensored... brought to you by Comedy Netwrok, and the letter Z. And white people. (That's a reference to Wonder Showzen, I'm not racist I swear!)
So anyway, the DVD starts off with all of them backstage praying before the show. It's actually the funniest shit ever. Those guys together is magic. Some of the greatest lines of the feature come from this intro, so pay a-fuckin'g-ttention!
First up on stage is Steve Lemme, and I have to say ever since Beerfest I just can't take him seriously in real life. I always picture him as Fink, who is just fantastic. I half wish that he would do some standup as that character because I'd probably fuck my TV screen if he did. Most of his bit was about masturbation... obviously pretty funny just based on the subject matter alone. It was well put together and every joke and topic flowed nicely, he was even able to pull off this awkward teddy bear chair fucking scenario which was altogether pretty uncomfortable. Now if he were Fink doing that shit...... duuude.
Next all but Jay Chandrasekhar hit the stage to perform an America's Got Talent parody with Kevin Heffernan as motherfucking SUSAN BOYLE.... which when I first realized this I was completely shocked and, well, almost offended for her... which makes it perfect. It's like 'yes, they went there' and you feel horrible for laughing but at the same time, Susan Boyle is funny shit. To be honest though I never watched her on TV and should probably do that to see how well they captured her but I just can't be bothered... I'm lazy, and drunk, and stoned, so fuck it. I'm assuming most of Kevin's actions were based on how she really is, but for me it fell a bit flat because I had no idea either way. Just the fact that they did this skit alone was pretty jokes though. And they threw in a "z job" reference so right on.
Paul Soter cums next and out of all of them - in real life/actor life not necessarily on this DVD - he's my favourite. He seemed so natural on stage talking to the audience like they were old chums, and his wife jokes were amazing. So bang on in regards to marriage life, so in turn HI-larious. I also love that they all referenced each other throughout their skits... so jokes.
A kind of dedication to Patrick Swayze (RIP) with Kevin and Steve followed Paul, and as much as I love Roadhouse I started to yawn once or twice throughout this one, although I love the dynamic the two of them have with each other and find them incredibly charming. It wasn't 'ripyourassholeapart' funny but it was still entertaining. Oh, and FUCK Matt Dillon!
Erik Stolhanske hit the stage next and immediately snapped me back into full concentration just by the way he addressed the audience... it was some good attention grabbing right thurr... and although his topics were more based around his wife and him and babies and all this crap that I don't really relate to in the slightest, I still found him endearing and enjoyed watching him.. not to mention giggled at least 4 times!
Finally Jay Chandrasekhar gets some time on stage and immediately jumps into some male on male on male threesome talk... and i immediately get a boner. At first I found him more than a little confusing and random but absolutely hilarious... especially the way he describes how being a girl is... TO THE 'T' BARRY err JAY! TO THE 'T'! The further in the less confusing and the funnier he got, and the stuff about Indians in Porn had me almost peeing my pants.
Kevin Heffernan was last up and hands down my favourite of the night. He chose full frontal nudity (referring to his sexy scene in Super Troopers) and went into gay bear jokes by the end of it. It KILLED. KILLED. I loved it. Watch it!
They ended it with all of them talking about how they met, which wasn't so much stand up but more good humoured chit chat for the audience. It was cute.
All in all, worth the watch AND PURCHASE for sure.
The bonus features were few. starting with the Super Trooper sketches they have that you can find on YouTube, variations of this one anyway. Second they had 'On The Road With Broken Lizard' which was basically just more stand up from each location and some behind the scene amateur footage. Lastly they put in an extended version of THE BEST INTRO EVER, which made me cum all over myself and the dvd remote unfortunately. So fucking hilarious. And outtakes, there were outtakes too but they were pretty sub-par.

And that's it for comedysheblogged folks. WERD.

I'm Sarah. I'll comedy if I want to.

Good 'Ol Neil Young!

Neil Young's new album Le Noise hits shelves today, are we all stoked or what?
I am.
Even though I've already heard it... suckers!
Produced by Daniel Lanois this album fits the title to the T.
The first bunch of songs take the listener back to Neil's experimental bout in the 80's with a definite modern twist (always able to incorporate what's growing in music at the time of each album, reshpekt) and no band, just him and his acoustic electric Sonic guitars.
The outcome isn't my favvvvvourite era of Neil Young, but I can respect the fact that it is super bad ass sounding.
I mean, the man has done it all! From rockabilly to synth-infused pop rock to grunge, you can say he's been around the block a FEW times. SO I guess this is what's left.
I don't know, I feel like the majority of songs are missing something.
Or maybe they're just too... spacy.
I just don't know what to think for the most part.
It sounds like he tapped back into Trans or Landing On Water for inspiration but it's a lot darker and more typical Neil Young-infused. "Hitchhiker" even extends influence back to Rust Never Sleeps or Ragged Glory slightly.
But I don't know.
Good 'ol Neil Young.
I'm sure it will take only a few more listens to get into it but at the same time I have to wonder what he was thinking when he decided to make this album this way...
I bet he was thinking "I'm an Artist! I do what I want"
And that's fair.
But where this album really gets me is when either "Love and War" or "Peaceful Valley Boulevard" come on.
These are two of the most brilliant Neil Young songs I've heard, and there are a ton of them out there to compare to.
The guitar is beautiful throughout each, and the lyrics are written to send me in a jealous fit of rage because I can't write songs like that.
They have the power that bands like Brand New hold over girls and boys of my generation, or my group of friends anyway.
I say it again... good 'ol Neil Young.
These songs alone are worth having the album, and it's good to hear him referring back to bison and Toronto, even though he likes to pretend he's American.
Either way, Neil Young is still an artist. And that's all I'm saying.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Tarek Kasmi - The New Century

At first when I gazed over Tarek Kasmi's myspace I was sure it was just going to be another emotional teenaged one man electro pop "punk" band who sang about milkshakes and vaginas. Surprisingly though he turned out to be a socially conscious posi-pop/post-hardcore punk outlet for real issues... basically a one man army with music as his weapon.
It's undeniably catchy and what impresses me is the fact that you never expect artists like this to spark a revolution using their lyrics, as opposed to sparking a fire in a young girl's undies. Although this style of music isn't something that I can really get into all on it's own I find myself actually liking it a lot more because I can really appreciate what he's trying to do here.
One guy.
One message. or maybe more, I didn't really count...
One completely different target audience than this message is usually passed along to.
And for that.... RIGHT ON MAN!

Check him out here!

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Okay, so it's settled then. Off With Their Heads are like the best new band out there!

Check them out here

Seriously do it.
They are AWESOME.
. . . . .

I am in love.
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3



Just listen to them dammit.

A Wilhelm Scream/Comeback Kid @ Opera House

I'm finding it more and more difficult to actually review shows when I interview the bands I'm supposed to critique, especially now that we're getting interviews at pretty much every show we hit. Let's face it, I do have a vagina (despite all my penis talk) and girls are crazy and let emotions run their lives. That said, the last thing I want to do after I have a great 15 minute conversation with band members who always turn out to be wicked people is rip them apart when they hit the stage.
I would if they deserved it... don't get me wrong, I really can't lie, but I don't enjoy it is basically what I'm trying to say.
This is why I tend to stick to the shadows at shows and avoid introducing myself to bands who invite me out.
Unfortunately that's kind of impossible if you want to pull off an interview.
Which is why I am so thankful in the case of Comeback Kid and A Wilhelm Scream at Opera House last week: 2 of my favourite bands, 2 of my favourite interviews so far, and one seriously epic show that calls for absolutely no criticism that I can think of.
I can now fully understand Julian's obsession with AWS after seeing them live.
For the longest time he would insist on playing them for me, and I always liked it but never ended up getting super into them for whatever reason.... and then I heard "Bulletproof Tiger" off of their last EP and I was like 'Holy Cack! I need to re-evaluate this band.'
I ended up buying all their albums on Itunes immediately and have been hooked ever since.
Hooked, but not obsessed.
I wish I didn't say this so much so this time it would have more of the impact the statement deserves, but A Wilhelm Scream are one of the best bands I have ever witnessed on stage.
They are the first band who has me considering just quitting my job and following their tour wherever it takes me.
They are the epitome of what 2010 punk rock is and or should be.
These guys are nuts to watch. They seem to have so much fun on stage both with each other and with the crowd, covering all open ground and never missing a note. While the singer introduced the songs the one guitar player closest to us would be kissing the fans hands... and minutes later he'd be at the mic playing his crazy guitar parts with his eyes closed, WHILE singing harmonies... harmonies that were multiplied by like 15 because of the crowd backing the band, EPIC EPIC EPIC!
The band even managed to drag both Julian and I into fanboy mode, and we are pretty professional with shows and shit.
At one point the guitar player was pulling this hilarious Tom Morello shit and Julian called him out and the dude loved it and kept coming back to play for us in the corner of the stage. It was impossible not to eat that shit up as part of the audience, no matter what the purpose was for being there.

Click the above picture for the rest of the album!

Madball was also there, and to be honest were kind of a disappointment. I thought I liked them a lot more than I actually did... I had pictured more of an H20 happiness to the band but it was hardcore to boot and wasn't incredibly entertaining to watch. Maybe it was just because they had to follow AWS...
Comeback Kid didn't waver under the pressure of following them up though, they fucking brought me right out of my stupor and knocked me into ecstasy again.
I was looking forward to seeing this band again after their phenomenal last album and it was everything I had hoped for. Damn is that album ever great. Check it out if you haven't heard it, titled Symptoms + Cures.
Anyway, they rock. I got wasted and don't have much else to say on that note except there were some really funny instances that occurred while they were playing, such as:
A kid being dragged out of the venue with blood pouring down his head. Is that funny? I think he was smiling...
Two kids ran into each other while stage diving.
My favourite was that half the crowd was trying to mosh and the other half were trying to throw down.
Check out my interview with Comeback Kid's drummer Kyle here!

Click to see the rest of the photo album!

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Ladies and gentlemen, presenting Stereos-Going-Through-Puberty

Abandon All Ships = Self proclaimed guidos at heart...
I don't even want to put the album on, hearing them live once with Protest The Hero was enough, I'm going to review their crappy bio I was sent because it's too stupid not to.
Apparently they think this crap they're playing is original.
90's Euro mixed with hardcore? AKA dance, techno or trance mixed with hardcore... that's never been done before? Pfffft.
Grand Scale did it so much better.
And they put these two over-used genres together SO POORLY it's pathetic. To call it original after slapping two crappy sounds together in one band, just like everyone else right now (example: half of warped tour's recent line up) is pretty geeved.
Is that how you use that shit?
Geeved, like is that for real?
I guess it's good they have a motto of basically 'fuck it all' 'fuck you' because I foresee a lot of people telling them how bad they are in the future and so they'd better be able to take it.
Like holy fuck they are terrible, just terrible.
I was half expecting me to end up liking the music when I finally forced myself to put on the CD, but thankfully it was even WORSE than I remembered!
Without the low (crappy) deep growling it is standable but then it's fully overdone and unoriginal. With the growling it sounds like somebody puked in my vagina. Lose lose situation.
And the best part is they're selling their badass selves on DisBand.
I just want to say that their DisBand just sounds so contrived. The only reason they got through with the style they play is because they fit the "punk/hardcore attitude" mold that Much WANTS to showcase by signing a band like this. I've had friends punk bands be interviewed and asked questions in order to make them sound like the way the commercial industry sees "punks" and when all of them gave mature, non angst ridden answers that didnt please the image the show moved on. They found this band who has NOTHING to do with punk and liked them because they fit the cliche the show was looking for.
So if this shitty band thinks they ruled by winning over Much hearts, maybe they should think again... They're just completely stereotypical and fit the cookie cutter Much Music image for a hardcore band. Where is the credibility in that?
If you don't know what I'm talking about try to find it in their biography... pretty jokes.
The thing is I have mad respect for Mark S from Underground Operations. I kind of grew up on Closet Monster and he's got a fair relation to Cobourg and I have no doubt he knows his shit.. even with Stereos, I had two roommates who loved them, I get it.... I hate it, but I get it.
I would love to know if he actually likes this band or not.
I guess they may sell... which I hate to admit but have to, and yet when I can turn on the commercial or marketable switches for music it still does nothing for me here.
I can actually say with 110% conviction that this is one of the worst bands out there today, anywhere. Even in Cobourg, even worse than the Go Time.
They are trying painfully hard and failing even harder.

I actually have no idea why they sent me this to review... I'm not doing this for the hell of it but when PR or whoever send me an album I have never said no to it. Clearly they didn't read how much I hated this band from my last review when I saw them live.
This is what I get when I'm not a selective asshole like *cough*punknews*uncough* when I post any and all band press releases I'm sent..

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

The Swingin' Utters vs Sick of it All

Take 2 separate tours: the first is a punk rock tour sporting happy-go-lucky, pop-and-country-infused bands (Swingin' Utters & The Copyrights) and the second a hardcore punk trio who get their fans so pissed off when they play that everyone keeps trying to beat up some poor invisible bastard lying on the floor (Sick Of It All, The Mongoloids, Wisdom In Chains).

Now combine them so that the two sets don't have to duke it out for an audience on one Saturday night in Toronto.

Now what do you get?

A show that starts 2 hours too early, with the most ridiculously incorporated line up ever and two separate crowds who don't know what to make of each other when under the same roof.
Now don't get me wrong, everybody seemed to get along quite well and actually were pretty supportive of each others bands while they were on stage (that's punk rock for ya!) but it was just incredibly unfortunate that The Copyrights had to open the show to a small handful of people, and were followed by two thrashy hardcore bands who encouraged a throwdown instead of a pit.
And the first hardcore band, The Mongoloids, were completely shittastic.
To read more about The Copyrights vs The Mongoloids check out Alyssa "Cuntlove"s review here!
In my opinion the show should have started with The Mongoloids, with Wisdom In Chains following (who were actually really good!) and The Copyrights third before Swingin' Utters hit the stage, and Sick Of It All closing the night.
That would have made a zillion times more sense, in my opinion anyway, because not only is Sick of it All a band that can easily appeal to crossover genres of the same sort, but Swingin' Utters put on the most intense and energetic performance with less country/folk influence and were actually fast enough to pass for heavy in this kind of crowd.
Not that a change in lineup would have made any difference to the two headliners though, despite the difference in weight both bands absolutely killed their sets and wowed every single fan in the crowd, no matter which band they were there for.
These pictures are words enough for how much people were able to appreciate Swingin' Utters and Sick Of It All alike.

Talk about a party!
Unfortunately I had a lot to say about Swingin' Utters incredible performance but accidentally deleted all my notes yesterday as I sat down to write about it.
And as per usual I was completely fucking smashed by the end of the show... My new thing is to get "whore drunk" on the weekends and it's catching on with all of my friends... it's quite exhausting. Not to mention mind numbing.
Whore Drunk = a girls equivalent of pirate drunk, where one eye is half shut and you're slurring your words together and saying arrrr a lot...except you're so wasted you act like a whore, just not in the slutty way if that makes any sense (I'm often too obliterated to even consider sleeping with anybody, maybe it's just me not being interested in picking up ever, but my whore drunk is a nonslutty whore drunk!)
What I do remember clearly is the smile tattooed on my face for the entire set, watching Johnny the singer as if he was 20 again jumping around on stage and covering every inch he had to work with. Spike on bass was a kickass treat on the eyes as he cooly strummed away almost directly in front of me on stage. Every one of them actually fought for the attention of my gaze throughout the performance, and although Johnny won for the most part it wasn't a surprise, he had more energy up there than I do after sleeping for 12 hours and chugging red bull or coffee. I don't know how the fuck he does it.
For them being one of my favourite bands, and this the first time seeing them, no amount of silly floor punching could have ruined this experience for me. Not after the set they put forward. They played every single song I wanted to hear, and more that I didn't even think of, and I'm surprised I didn't end up with lock jaw in the end after allowing my mouth to lay open for as long as they were on the stage.

Click for more photos!

Sick Of It All actually had quite the competition from Swingin' Utters when they took the stage, which is hilarious when you listen to the difference between them in recordings.
Not that they disappointed in the slightest either.
Heavy as fuck, I almost felt the anger rising inside of me just listening to the craziness, but just as I raised my fists I stopped myself and realized I'm not a complete reTARD, and slowly put my hands down at my sides and settled for singing along and the occasional head nod.
How embarrassing.

Check out videos of each band and how much they contrasted each other here!

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

The Copyrights vs The Mongoloids

Review Submitted by: Alyssa "Cuntlove"!
The Copyrights hit the Opera House stage last night bright and early at about 7:15, and holy fuck, did they ever reaffirm my love of live punk rock. They played their songs way faster than on the cd, and it sounded awesome, tight, loud, and full of attitude. Watching the guys rock out on stage was honestly a real treat. Let's be honest here, kids, pop-punk bands are usually fun to watch, but they very rarely seem to look good doing it. The Copyrights sure as hell did. Singer/bassist Adam Fletcher gave an especially notable performance and was a real standout with his super aesthetically pleasing way of using his entire mouth to sing and sweet dance moves. I know the mouth thing sounds weird....but trust me, it's badass! They didn't really have any on stage banter, which was great, they just paused for a few seconds after each song before launching into the next with just as much energy. Despite the fact that they didn't play Planet Earth Nineteen-Ninety-Four or Stuck In Summertime (my two favourites!!), and Fletcher didn't seem very happy with the set when we spoke to him afterwards (wtf, dude!?!?!?), I thought it was genius, and I consider it one of my favourite sets I've ever seen. It's really unfortunate that there weren't more people at the venue yet to see them play! Also very notable/awesome: the guitarest-who-was-on-stage-left's mustache (sorry, don't know his name!!!), and the lighting!

Or click for more pictures!

The next band however.... well, let me put it this way: if Julian and I hadn't been making fun of them the entire time, and I weren't already a few beers deep, they would have totally ruined my buzz. The Mongoloids is a heavily metal-influenced half-assed hardcore band that were really strange to be playing right after The Copyrights. The banter between songs was beyond seriously, who tells the crowd to smile because "it's getting depressing up here [on stage]". Dude, maybe if you were a little more entertaining people would be having fun, and therefore smiling. Then, for some reason that is waaaaay beyond my comprehension, people decided it would be cool to throw down. By throw down I mean swinging your limbs around aimlessly in no real correlation to the music in a way that makes you look like a fucking idiot. I'm not a violent person, but I wanted to body check each and every one of them and kick them in the teeth. It was a very similar feeling to the the one I get around pro-life groups.... Anyways! That aside, musically speaking they actually weren't that bad. And their bass player had a pretty cool see-through bass..... I have nothing else nice to say....

Check out videos of each band and how much they contrasted each other here!

THANKS Alyssa "Cuntlove" !!!

Jack Jeffery - Passage to Agadir

When this guy first emailed me I didn't even have to listen to a damn track before knowing I wanted to write about it…
the way he described it was
"largely ambient, psychedelic, and progressive rock influenced by Pink Floyd, Alan Parsons, The Beatles, The Velvet Underground, The Moody Blues, and Brian Eno. The tracks are sequenced to transport the listener on a trip through ambient, psychedelic, electronic, acoustic, and folk rock soundscapes."
and when I hit play on the first track "Whiskey Burns" I was shocked to realize it was like the best possible song for me to listen to at this moment in time… having just woken up at 3pm from a crazy, shitty night and immediately poured a glass of whiskey/arizona half&half to go with my tea biscuit breakfast.. I am pretty sure I was taking one burning sip when the chorus hit and I felt like Jeff was watching me Corey Hart stylez outside my window.
When he stated the sound dynamics of his music I never doubted I would love it but I didn't expect to connect so emotionally to a style so outside my element.
Hearing this album on vinyl would be epic... the other night we were listening to the Wish You Were Here record and it orgasmically charged my ears for hearing this album now.
I find myself getting lost repeatedly while listening, but lost in a good spacey drug trip sort of way.
Hearing this band brings you closer to the feeling that your parents all got when they heard Pink Floyd for the first time or when The Beatles started doing their psychedelic stuff, and they had never heard such music before and it was almost like it was from another planet… well I haven't heard a band of our time perform music of their generation so precisely with the 2010 influence still under the surface, which leads me to believe that Jack Jeffery is probably an alien. Just sayin'!
Listening to the whole album is a process though… not only is it long, but it seems to travel through time and take weeks to finish one song. Luckily it's an album I'd be willing to dedicate weeks to hearing.
Click to buy album!

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Go Rydell - The Golden Age

Review Submitted By: Alyssa "Cuntlove"
As soon as I clicked play, I fell in love with Go Rydell's The Golden Age. They reminded me, at first, of a less epic sounding Banner Pilot with a little Leftover Crack flavour, but the more I listened, the more I heard other (very clear) influences such as Kid Dynamite, Shook Ones and Paint It Black. Needless to say, the album isn't the most diverse or original thing I've ever listened to. The songs do blend in together for sure, leaving me unable to decide on one really outstanding track, but when they sound so awesome doing it, who really gives a fuck!
It's upbeat, punk-as-fuck, and the perfect album to get you pumped up for anything with it's posi-core lyrics and the occasional "woah-oh". Although hardcore bands tend to run the risk of sounding grungy and messy, Go Rydell successfully avoid doing so, keeping their songs as tight as Sarah's vagina. The crunchy vocals and driven guitars, alongside a sweet beats a heart-throbbing bass line create an album that makes you want to go out and fuck shit up (in a posi-core kind way).
With ten songs totaling 14.7 minutes, The Golden Age is short and sweet. It's longest song comes in at a lovely 1:51. It may leave you wanting more, but it's still well-worth the listen.
The Golden Age - July 27, 2010
Click to check them out on myspace!

THANK YOU Alyssa "Cuntlove"!

PointDexter - Neoanamoly

I have to say, the first song on PointDexter's album Neoanomaly was a write off for me. Something about it just made me think this album was going to be a bit more 'pussy' than I originally expected... however, once the second song hit with this jazzy funk element to it like that of Danger Radio I realized that I had definitely judged way too soon. All of a sudden the record had this Phantom-Of-The-Opera-meets-boy-band feel to it, and on top of that there are actually these ripping guitar and piano solo's throughout that are just totally unexpected paired up with this style of vocal.
With each song I enjoyed it more and more, and when "Someday" hit I was actually floored.
It's more of an upbeat song that you'd definitely hear as a single on radio stations like ChumFM and Virgin, and although they lost a bit of the edge that they had in the first few songs it was probably for the best, because this song is addicting as fuck just the way it is.
The next one follows suit but strays back to the more 'badass' sound, but while still keeping the tone of the last one, equipped fully with a piano solo and aching drums that rise up to intensity when all the rest of the albums com back in.
This type of song is exactly what his vocals need to be paired with.
It's kind of like O-Town with a shit load more instrumental backing ... with piano that isn't just thrown in idiotically for effect, piano that actually plays a huge part in each song in a genre that doesn't normally require keys for accompaniment.
This band has so many elements in it: jazz, classical, funk, classic rock, blues = all of which are hiding just beneath the emopoprock garment the band is wearing, which is probably worn by the singer alone.
An album like this with so many different aspects could easily result in a way-too-confusing collection of songs that spans too far in every direction to attach itself to fans of any particular genre.. but in PointDexter's case it actually works pretty well for once and doesn't leave my head spinning too fast on the floor when it ends.

Check out the song "Someday" below.

Check them out on their myspace.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Bears… Beards… Banquets?

All I gotta say is thank fuck for the walls isolating me at work from the rest of the office because despite being restricted to headphones whenever I play Banquets EP This Is Our Concern, Dude I can't even help but sing along, and when I sing along I get animated. I've already been caught several times when I don't hear the door because I have it cranked so loud in my head, or when people sneakily cut around the corner unnoticed.. but I don't even care, if they were to listen to it they'd be dancing at their desks too.
It can be described in one basic, overly used for music (at least in my blog) term...
*drum roll please*

fuck) .

On the slightly more emo side of rock-influenced pop punk (haha, just basically throwing every genre into that eh) it's far from cheesy and every chorus has impossible-to-resist hooks that justify the emotional element in both lyrics and music.
Each song manages to grab you by the shirt and drag you along through it, staring each track in the face with unwavering focus.
Even listening to it now I keep having to pause writing and actually just listen and sing along.
The only downside to it is that there's only 4 songs to fill your hunger. It's almost like Jaws only having 4 bloody human carcasses to last him 6 months, or however long it will be until we hear new material from the band.

Grab the EP here.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

The words “I’m going to kick you in the face” have never sounded so sexy....

Typically "I'm going to kick you in the face" would be looked at more as a threat, but in the case of The Stone Foxes and their song "Patience" off the new album Bears & Bulls I feel like it should be viewed as more of a promise.
Easily one of the most brilliantly put together rock albums of 2010, it was recorded not in a studio but live over a period of shows until perfected with surprisingly little overdubs and a hell of a lot of live integrity. With serious rock'n'roll elements intertwined with slight southern/bluesy undertones and equipped with a totally badass attitude and the sincerity of the 70's, this album has the potential to be a "classic rock" hit for the next 30+ years by the same standards as Buffalo Springfield and The Band etc.
There's not a single song on the album that I dislike, even after the hundredth listen, and I feel like after hearing it my only goal leftover in life is to see this band live on stage.
The instruments are like wandering hands, the ones that you pretend to slap away the first couple of tries so that you don't seem too easy but it's clear that you want them to keep trying, and eventually you let their sweet caresses cover your entire body and stimulate you uncontrollably ... All the while the vocals are whispering sweet nothings in your ear, reciting every line in the book and it's so convincing that you fall for every single word without regret.
Check them out on their myspace, and get especially hooked on the song "Stomp" because it's the best thing I've heard in a really long time.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Pennywise/The Riverboat Gamblers/Authority Zero @ Sound Academy

Man, I am completely swamped this week so I apologize profusely in advance because this review is kind of late, kind of rushed, and kind of not my best material. On top of shit blowing the fuck up for me at MSB we just lost our (stolen) internet at home exactly when I needed it most for all the interviews and crap we did over the weekend. *grumbles* I guess that’s karma for stealing it in the first place…
Whatever. What is it that I’m even reviewing here…
Authority Zero/The Riverboat Gamblers/Pennywise at the Sound Academy this past Friday.
First of all I have to say I fucking HATE the Sound Academy… mostly because of the shit-tacular location that takes at least 30 minutes and at least $20 (taxi) to get to from anywhere in the city. I swear you could be down the road at the Go Karts and it would STILL take you half an hour to get to the fucking thing.
Of course we left super early and ended up STILL missing the first couple Authority Zero songs, which was the whole reason I was there to see the show (that and The Riverboat Gamblers are like my favourite band in life) and I spent probably $50 on cabs to and from the damn venue that night. I really need to figure out how to claim this shit on my taxes…. Anybody? Mom?
Luckily we did catch most of Authority Zero thanks to a very coordinated cab driver and THANK FUCKING SPOCK that we did because holy cow, they destroyed every assumption I had in my head over how they’d be after 15+ years of performing.
They moved around that stage as if they were in high school still, it was a spectacular sight - one that had me pretty much frozen in place for their whole set. The one aspect of their performance and energy that held hands with the fact that they are pretty much veterans was how they were able to get the crowd so completely involved with the performance, the singer was racing around stage and jumping onto barriers and reaching the audience, forcing everyone to get into it. And the best part was the number of super young fans who were there singing along to every word. It was kick ass!

Next band to perform was The Riverboat Gamblers, who ever since I caught their too-short set at Warped Tour 2010 I have been DYING to see again, and literally dreaming about how fucking nasty (like good nasty) they are on stage. I can honestly say they put on one of the best shows I’ve ever witnessed, and I have seen way too many shows to count. The funniest part about them is that the singer looks and dresses very similar to the lead singer of Mariana’s Trench, but the music is a thousand times more badass and another thousand times just simply better. For one of the first times I actually used my media pass to take pictures of them on stage and it literally made my life to be that close to these guys (and I never get like this) … having the singer literally BOUNDING over me while I sat there with my mouth wide open hoping his penis would miraculously fall inside it (WHOA, kidding, kidding…. And just fyi this joke is based on how intensely amazing the music/band is, and has nothing to do with his looks or any of that slutty girl shit) it was like my dreams all came true in that 40 minutes alone. Being so close had me in complete awe and I almost couldn’t function up there (but I did, and well too because my pictures ROCK!) and I felt fully VIP with each member posing for my pictures and fully aware of my presence. Thanks for making my life RG!
Check out a shitty sounding but wicked looking video of their performance here!

And on that note, thanks Pennywise for immediately destroying my buzz.
I don’t even know how much I want to go into details about their mediocre performance, but I was really let down by it. Considering I’ve seen Pennywise a bunch before I know how wicked they could be, and new singer or not has nothing to do with it (because Ignite is fucking awesome!) there was just absolutely no edge to any of the songs and it felt completely fake, forced and just plain fuuuucked.
I was bored, to say the very least.
And I mean, they had a fucking clapalong… Pennywise…. A clapalong… a buh?
Last time I saw Pennywise I almost got crushed, literally crushed, between like 5 huge biker dicks moshing so hard around me that I’m pretty sure I broke some bones – now THAT was a fun show!
No wonder the Sound Academy was only at HALF of it’s normal size for the show… maybe everybody else found out how bad the band is now and bailed early. The Sound Academy’s sound is shit to begin with and with only one guitar and only half the venue it was worse than I thought possible.
At one point the band announced that they were going to play a “fast song” and played one that was even slower than the previous, which I at least got a good laugh at. Each sounded like it was moving at snail pace compared to any other time I’ve seen them, and age can’t have anything to do with it after Authority Zero ripped their shit apart the way they did.
Not only was it painfully slow, but it was also PAINFULLY SCRIPTED. Fletcher seemed to have had every single move planned on stage that showcased him, and the singer was basically sucking his dick the entire time by throwing the attention towards him constantly.
I have a lot more written down about how crappy it was but to be honest this is really depressing me talking about it, so I’m going to end things here.

(click on all the pictures to see the rest of the album!)

I’m Sarah. I do what I want.

Millencolin/Sainte Catherines @ Phoenix/Sneaky Dee's

Review by: Alyssa "CuntLove"
So, I’ve basically been waiting to see Millencolin again since I saw them at the Opera House two years ago and had my mind blown, and the show at the Phoenix last night did not disappoint. So what if it was a Sunday night and I have to be in Guelph for class by noon today…fuck it!
I was stoked to hear that Wish Me Luck, Mockingbird was set to open, since a friend of mine introduced their music to me about a week ago and they sounded pretty badass… but I’m not exactly sure what went on with them last night. I may have just gotten to the venue a bit too late (8:00!?) and missed them, or maybe they played while I was waiting to sit in on Julian’s interview with Millencolin, but I think they may have actually not shown up, causing Millencolin’s set to be bumped from 10:30 to 9:30. That’s how I chalked it up until I saw that they had some merch there. ***Epic confusion***
So whatever, I guess I’ll just have to go hit up one of their shows another time. Bastards.
The Sainte Catherines of Montreal hit the stage around 8:30 and launched into a set that actually far exceeded my expectations. Don’t get me wrong, they’re not anything overly original, but they played a slightly above average set with a lot of guts, and overall, I found them quite charismatic. Maybe not an album I’d spend time listening to on my own, but definitely a band I’d be interested in seeing live again. They all looked greasy as fuck (mad respect!) and they played the stage with a lot of energy, especially the singer, who even stopped to “conduct” at one point, which was pretty funny, although he could have used a little band camp to help him with his form ***half joking☺***.
The aspect of this band that stood out most, at least in my opinion, was the drummer. Okay, so I’m a little biased because grrrls in the punk scene kind of make me need new panties, but even while I was buying my beer before I started paying attention to the stage I was thinking “well, fuck, it’s about time someone hits the drums like they mean it!” Her drumming was pretty tight, and she was wicked fun to watch. I managed to run into her during Millencolin’s set, and told her that she played a great set and that it was awesome seeing badass, talented women in punk rock. She thanked me and told me that she tries to represent. Fuck. Yeah.
Millencolin was on next, and as they played through Pennybridge Pioneers in its entirety, I felt like I was 16 again. It’s one of my favourite albums, and I think it’s pretty safe to say that every single song on it is catchy, badass, and, well, just plain fucking awesome. They played the songs a lot faster live than on the album, which worked beautifully, since it made them that much easier for the crowd to dance/mosh to. They weren’t exactly flawlessly tight (I picked up a few fuck-ups here and there), but the pure energy of the band, and just of the quality of the songs themselves were enough that it didn’t matter. Anyone who wasn’t overly musically inclined probably wouldn’t have even noticed any flaws at all.
They were each excellent performers, pulling off sweet moves like it was nobody’s business and making it really difficult to get a decent picture of him, since they were constantly moving. Another great aspect of the performance was the backing vocals, which were tight and (95% of the time) right on. The volume was turned up maybe a little too high on the mics, but it still sounded awesome.
After Millencolin’s set, we headed over to Sneaky Dee’s at College and Bathurst and were serenaded by Nikola Šarčević, (Millencolin’s singer), who played a solo acoustic set. He played a few of his own songs (even a couple in Swedish!) as well as some covers. It was lovely, but, being an acoustic set, it was a little on the boring side, and left me wishing the cover hadn’t been ten friggin’ dollars. The highlight of this set was definitely when Mathias Färm (Millencolin’s guitarest) joined Nikola on stage to sing on a cover of The Misfit’s “Skulls”. They made it their own, slowing it down, leaving it sounding gorgeous and haunting.
So in all, incredible night, incredible shows, well worth passing out in the middle of my poly sci lecture.






Orphan Choir/Blacklist Royals/The Roman Line @ Bovine for Strung Out's Official After Party!

Last night was a wicked fucking night at the Bovine downtown Toronto, aside from TIFF and the 4am last call (which really fucked shit up for work today for me btw).
It was the Strung Out after party featuring Orphan Choir, Blacklist Royals, and The Roman Line.
Boyyyy did it lick cunt. But, like, in a great lezzy way! Like, you've got the equipment and you know how to use it kind of way.
It was my first time seeing Orphan Choir and I was pretty impressed... at least for the first half of it. With my favourite husky style vocals with heavily done punk rock it was definitely down my alley, but towards the end it became a little too ... boring? The slower songs sounded a bit like Lucero, and there were a little too many of them if you ask me... but the faster ones were kick ass. I vaguely remember one of them telling me that one of the guys who played with them had only done it once before? And the other dude had only been in the band for like as little as a month or some shit... (man I wish I wasn't so drunk at that point when he told me this... oh well!) Regardless check them out.

Mmmmmm next were my new favourite band pretty much, a twang-infused punk band called Blacklist Royals (check out my interview with them here) who reminded me a lot of what Rancid probably would have sounded like had they grown up in Nashville. Punk and country, what more can you possibly ask for (nothing if you're a redneck punk lover like myself). They put on one hell of a show, but see for yourself in this video. Easily one of the best lesser-known bands of the last 5 years. And in my opinion, far superior to Gaslight Anthem (who they have some similarities with) live. Because Gaslight SUCKED when I saw them.

Last was The Roman Line, who we all know I love.. and can't really write about anymore since I've become friends with one of them, HOWEVER they did do a John Prine cover of "All The Best" which I had never heard before, and I was actually blown away at how they could take a song like that and give it their own sound, while not straying too much from the original.. like it's uncanny how much it sounded like it was theirs. It was wicked. John Prine + The Roman Line = The Tits.

(click on the pictures to see more)
I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Weezer - Hurley

Today I tried to listen/review the new Weezer album Hurley and got about 4 songs in before I had to give up.


And barely funny.


Even "Where's My Sex" which sounds like it should be a hilarious song just makes me want to barf out of boredom.

Check out the snoozefest streaming here for free.

I'm pretty sure Weezer is done in my mind now.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

This just can't be linked to Link 80 ...

Like really, what the fuck is this about?

This band is like an ode to the now defunct Toronto band Grand Scale.
They're called Gnarboots and I seriousy don't get how members of Link 80, and Shinobu can make such crappy poppy 3oh!3-meets-Depeche Mode SHIT!

Check it out here.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

antillectual - Start From Scratch

If you haven't heard of antillectual before you better fucking get on it. They are being dubbed one of the best/hard working Dutch punk bands (they're from the Netherlands) that exist today, and after listening to snippets of their new album, Start From Scratch due out November 2010, I'd have to agree with the 'best' part.
The vocals strongly resemble those of Bad Religion, especially with the socially and politically conscious lyrics behind them, while the music takes on a more hardcore sound applicable to Strike Anywhere (and they cover Kid Dynamite, if you want to dive deeper into the band's hardcore association) with the huskyness of bands like Nothington etc.
So what I'm saying here is they FUCKING RULE, more or less.
Also? One dude in the band has a very pretty beard.
And beards ALWAYS make the music sound that much better.
At least the good ones, not the hipster fucking beards. FUCK HIPSTERS!
Anyway, check out these 3 tracks off their upcoming album:
"The Hunt Is On"
"America's Worst Role Model"
"Buyers Remorse"

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Kadawatha, BITCHES!

Wow, it's been a while since I've actually written a review of anything, oops!
It's not like I don't have albums to write about... but my new apartment has proved to be a pretty much constant party and for the last month my mind has been a haze of whiskey hangovers and too many cigarettes (oh shit, back on those again. quitting fail.) And when I'm not drinking/hungover I am constantly procrastinating doing anything productive with my good friends Donkey and Diddy Kong.
Unfortunately I'm stuck on a level right now that's totally pissing me off so I'm actually going to spit something out of my ass for a band called Kadawatha from Sri Lanka I'm assuming.
And by spit out of my ass I mean write to the best of my abilities... in this mindset.
Not only is this house ruining my brain cells but it's also destroying my ability to stay un-genre-biased with bands and I find myself discriminating more and more against anything that isn't punk rawk motherfucker. I blame my snobby punk loving roommates (haha I wonder if they'll ever read this, just kidding guys... but you know it's true).
A few months ago when I lived with two girls who listened to 13 year old girl oriented music I definitely was able to open my mind up a lot more to that point of view. Back then it wouldn't have taken some serious holding back on my part to write this review, because as a more emo/rock/Angels & Airwaves type of sound Kadawatha is just something for the 12 year old in me............wait, that sounds bad.. the 12 year old girl in me, like me in me... or whatever. This same girl has been slowing getting buried alive for the last month though and now based on the A&A similarities alone I would rather just write the band off.
Truth be told though, even though I want to hate it the music has this hook to it that I can't shake and I find myself hanging in there. On the surface it may not be something I want to take seriously but when you actually listen it becomes catchy as poop. The vocals are my main focus, the range is impressive although he goes a little too over the top at times (like we get it, you can hit high notes, chill) but aside from that it's all very well put together, not too technical and kind of spread out with this new U2-like epicness, mixing a slew of different styles in with this aerobics class for the throat.

Try not to get even a little bit hooked and visit their myspace.
They will be appearing on the Honda Civic Tour this year so check out those dates while you're there.

I'm Sarah, I do what I want.