Sam Coffey and the Iron Lungs review BY JULIAN!

Right from the opening drum roll, I can feel the nostalgia behind Sam Coffey and the Iron Lungs.  
That familiar sounding descending guitar riff immediately brought me back to that lovely autumn day on the farm, with a cider in my hand and a breeze at my back.  It's crazy how easy it is for music to send you back to the most wonderful of memories, and with SCATIL (hahaha scat) in your ears it's impossible to remember anything except the best of times.
The raw rowdy-yet-lazy singing brought me back to those wonderful days surrounded by green, where you have a million things to do before the sun goes down, but just can't help moseying along slowly and enjoying every barrage on your senses.  Anyway, enough about my mindscape.   
Happy, happy, happy. That's what it sounds like to me. 
From the first note of this EP to the last note.  
Vocal harmonies throughout the record are spot on, which always makes this guy super fucking stoked. What makes them even better is that they are spot on in the "notes are right" sense, not in the  "auto-tune these harmonies so you can barely notice them" sense. 
It's like they're a band, comprised of dudes, singing songs they like! Who would have thought?  
Add that to some greasy quasi-twangy guitar and upbeat perfectly-simple drumming and you've got yourself a feel-good couple tunes!
The highlight of this release for me was at the end of "Lose that bitch".  Not only does the song scream 'locomotion' influence & 50's r&r (that's rock & roll for you acronym-impaired) influence in general, but that INCREDIBLE falsetto 'la la la la laaaaa' mixed with the too-deep-for-my-normal-voice doodle-doodle-dah is just a fan-FUCKING-tastic addition.  No song should be without a part like that.
Overall, an exciting release that really shows what SCATIL have to offer. I can imagine it live, 12 beers deep, twice as fast.  Fucking fun.  That is all.



SLATES are a melodic punkrock'n'roll band from Edmonton who like Ghostbusters II better than the first one. At least Lee does according to their FACEBOOK PAGE .
I can't say I disagree. But I can't say I agree either.
Ghostbuster politics aside I'm like a dog in a garden when it comes to their new album Prairie Winds... just a'diggin'!
The album sports a harder, more serious sound falling under the 'rock' side of punk rock up until track #8 when it suddenly does a stage dive in the other direction with an upbeat, purely punk song which so happens to be my favourite off the album.
They don't indulge in this side of themselves for very long though, and the next track they're right back to the raw rock-stantines sound (that's a play on Constantines, because at times that's who they remind me of!).
From then on the songs seem to get progressively more abrasive, ending with a shit-solid-melodid(...crap) anthem-worthy gem that leaves the drums banging and guitars ripping away in your head long after it's over.
I'm loving it.
They've been compared to bands like Black Flag, Fugazi, Husker Du and The Replacements, so they've got to be quite great to end up with such similarities.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Listen to ME and Listen to Them!

I'm sporting my bossy pants this Monday morning.
They're pretty comfortable, a little stiff and tight in the crotch area, but a great fit in the butt.
Since I'm wearing them I feel I need to tell you what you should be listening to today.
So listen up, jerks, and discover a something or few.

This band is a folk-pop orgy of the ears.

Swapping my bossy pants for my dance pants for this one... drum and bass noise rock along the lines of DFA1979. Reminds me of tornado farts, except they don't stank.

It's summer. You're people. You do the math. HINT: It ='s you listening to this album.

Rockin', bass-EEEE, almost punk rock.

For fans of things that make boners, things that are 'the tits', and everything between. Fun, quasi-surfy pop punk that reminds me of Chixdiggit and all them types.

They don't have music for me to embed so they suck. But the music is great. Take my word for it *moons you with bossy pants*


I'm Sarah. I do what I want.


I missed the following bands and many more. And I'm sad about it. BUT if you check them out then I'll be less sad, k thanks!

OKAY BYE NXNE 2012 !!!!!

NXNE DAY #5: The Pussypops & Tight Nuns @ Crawford

I hate the Crawford. Normally. NXNE I hated it more than ever. WORST RUN SHOW of the Festival for sure. I walked in at exactly 8:45 when The Pussypops were supposed to take the stage. Not a soul in sight at the door to check passes/wristbands/take money or anywhere, and the band wasn't even on stage yet. They started soon after, which was great, but halfway through their second song as I'm standing there trying to watch and review the band this dude from the bar comes around to ID the crowd. A little late considering by that time most of the people downstairs already had a beer in hand. Get your shit together and take ID's at the door, this is the last day of a huge festival, what . the . fuck . Crawford . ! Don't disturb people after the band has begun. Annoyinggggg! LUCKILY The Pussypops popped my pussy well enough for me to forget ALLL about where I was or how much I hated it. They were like the Yeah Yeah Yeah's ate out the Distillers and burped out this raunchy indie puss pop punk. FUCKING AWESOME! I wish I had some music of theirs to share with you but it's on it's way. Until then, visually pop your pussy by visiting their FACEBOOK.

Tight Nuns I saw a while ago and loved. And I loved them again. This is my last review of NXNE and I JUST WANT IT TO ENDDDDD. SO just believe me when I say they are awesome. and I was too tired to really pay more attention than that. Check them out here.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY #4: Portugal. The Man & The Flaming Lips @ Y&D Squrrd

Portugal. The Man are probably in my top 5 favourite bands of all time. I just frikkin love them. When I saw they were coming to NXNE I shat, shit and pooped my pants all at once. When I noticed it was at Yonge & Dundas my stomach dropped again, but in a bad way this time.
WHYYYYYYY did that have to be my first experience with them live!!!
I almost didn't want to go... I hate crowds at Y&D, nobody knows the meaning of 'excuse me' when they're thrown into that scene it seems, and you always get just the WORST combination of people who don't even know the band playing or care to listen to them at all.
That was exactly the case on Saturday evening. Of Montreal had just played and The Flaming Lips were up next, so PtheM appeared to be playing to mostly these fans, not their own. Which was unfortunate but also great for them. I'm really hoping that they gained hundreds of fans that night, because despite the location they sounded BRILLIANT. The square Square didn't ruin my first live experience as long as I could see them on screen and hear the perfect sound of their perfect songs I was boner-happy.
All I want now is to see them back in Toronto again soon so I can have an even BETTER experience at a show all their own.

The Flaming Lips weren't really something I was super excited for, again because of where it was. BUT I am all about using the 'once in a lifetime' card on bands like this in order to encourage myself to go, and I had a blast watching their crazy performance. It was only then that I realized that 'once in a lifetime' happens every time the Lips get on stage. They are one of the most creative acts out there, still, and it's not a show that you EVER want to pass up.
Wayne Coyne (the singer, obvy) rolled out on stage IN (literally) a huge see-through bubble and went crowd surfing in it. It's quite possibly the FUNNEST (word) entrance of all time, and I would do ANYTHING to do it myself (EXCEPT work really hard to start a band and become super famous).


NXNE DAY #3: Ambisonic @ The Rochester / Times Neue Roman + Sandman Viper Command @ Sneaky Dee's

First of all I just used up all my wacky brain power on the Brasstronaut review I just wrote, so I'm all out of care bears for this one.
Second of all I have barely any notes / memory of these shows because, let's face it, Friday night of NXNE - the first night I didn't have to wake up for work the next day - clearly I was drunk.
So let's jut half-ass these last 3 of the night and call it even so I can play some Batman Asylum and pass the fack auoot.

I only caught the very last bit of Ambisonic's set but I enjoyed what I saw. Badass drummin' and some guitarin' to match, and considering that's all the band consists of I'd consider them to be SUPERbadass. Chizzeck them out hrrrr.

Times Neue Roman were also just finishing up their set when I got to Sneaky Dee's and it was so fucking refreshing to hear some hip hop in the nxne'hizzzauss. I really enjoyed them, it was like watching the 90's.. more specifically an episode of Fresh Prince.

Sandman Viper Command then took to the stage, and I went from excited to see/hear them again because I used to be a fan to super disappointed because they sounded like a bazillion times poppier than I remember and were not at all what I expected to hear from them. It's almost as if the singers balls went from dropped to, well, not dropped. It was sad, so sad. So sappy. So boring. So, BLEH.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY#3: Brasstronaut @ The Gladstone Ballroom

"uh, can we get more clarinet in the monitor?" - Brasstronaut on stage at NXNE

Damn. I was hoping to channel some Beetlejuice magic in the house - literally, in my house in Toronto.
Repeating something any number of times in order for something to appear just doesn't fucking work. GHAKKK.
Not only is Beetlejuice a sham of a legend (and by legend I mean movie), Bloody Mary never once materialized screaming/cursing/strangling me, nor did the Candyman emerge to hook me .. and Biggie sure as hell never showed up to shoot me in the face.

Bummers all around, right?
Yet, here I am crossing my fingers (but not my toes, miracles don't respond to the greedy) and repeating 'Brasstronaut' ceaselessly hoping to be swept back to the third night at NXNE with them on the stage in front of me.
I wonder if I should just look for some sort of large whistle and hope it warps me to the right day. Might have butter luck. heh.
too late?
Honestly though, Brasstronaut was the highlight of my NXNE experience for sure. I have been waiting for so long to see them again it felt like an alien life form was living in my chest desperately trying to get out and attach itself to the band in order to stay alive.
(uhhhh want to know what I'm talking about? watch the movie Slither)
I mean, I get shivers from just hearing them. Actual shivers, like the ones that you get when you're getting off... of a higher-than-you-expected step.
And live.. live they are just magical.
It's like nothing else matters when they are on stage.
Although I'd say that they have that affect on crappy computer speakers alone.
They played a WAY TOO SHORT set consisting of almost all new songs.
As disappointed as I was that I didn't get to hear the songs I've been repeating over and over and over,  their new stuff is fantastic and it was impossible not to enjoy it no matter how familiar it was to the ears.

If you ever see this, Brasstronaut... please come back!

Although I understand if it takes you a long time to find your singer/etc in order to do so.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY#3: Útidúr @ The Gladstone Ballroom

Útidúr (pronounced: ooh! - detour) are this spectacular twelve piece from Iceland who basically act out (with their instruments) grandiose and theatrical orchestral pop.
It's CRAZY COOL and the most surprising(ly good) performance I caught this year.
Obviously everyone from Iceland is awesome and good at everything - just ask the Mighty Ducks - and this band is no exception. It looked as if everything they did was with ease and the music just floated out of their fingers and mouths like beautiful butterflies emerging from their electric cocoons.

Well played, Iceland. Well played.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY#3: METZ @ Wrongbar

Wrongbar is the WRONG BAR (tee hee) for punk shows. It's an awesome venue, and an awesome dance bar, but unfortunately carries the same crowd no matter which is happening. I had to leave the METZ show partly because of the idioDICK audience that I was stuck behind near the back. It was my fault for getting their late, but totally their faults for being alive. It's called a bridge guys, go jump off one.
For reals though, I overheard some cunt in the bathroom complaining about getting pushed by a dude in the pit because she wanted to be in front of the stage. She had the most annoying "like, you know, whatever" voice and her friends were equally as dumb and reminded me of this:

I'm sorry but, IT WAS A PUNK SHOW. THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN BITCHES GET IN THE WAY AT A PUNK SHOW. Go eat a cock sandwich or something and grow some balls.
It didn't help when she admitted to not even being there for the band or knowing who they were. Clearly just Wrongbar regulars showing up on a Friday night to ruin my fun.

IF it hadn't been for them skankz I would have had a perfectly splendid time. METZ were, no surprise, FUCKING AWESOME and noisy as hell, and no word of a lie one of the band dudes actually rocked his glasses right out of the frames. WOWZERS!
I've missed seeing them every other time in Toronto and can finally breathe a sigh of relief (aka orgasm) at catching them this time around.
Not to mention I'll be seeing them at SAPPYFEST this summer, which I'm shitting balls over already.
Honestly, they are way better live than on album.
Go see them, k?

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY#2: The Motorleague AND Careers In Science @ The Rochester

This was my first time at The Rochester since it's venue debut, and I have to say it's AWESOME. It's got that sleazy strip club feel to it, lots of booths and TWO BARS! Holy macaroni boner man! More shows here please...and less skin.

I got there JUST in time to catch The Motorleague and I'm really kicking myself for not arriving sooner and seeing their whole set. Unfortunately that's the curse of festivals like NXNE, too much running around and not enough seeing-of-bands.
What I saw really blew my butt away (not to be confused with farting, it didn't make me fart, but my butt was blown.)
The dudes in Careers In Science were pumping them guys up so much that I knew I had to see them, and by doing so I performed my own little experiment PROVING THAT SCIENTISTS ARE TRUSTWORTHY PEOPLE!!!
At least when it comes to musical recommendations.
In the short time I heard them they reminded me of Careers In Science actually, mixed with "The Decline" by NOFX. It was absolutely riveting. Hallelujah and all that jazz.

Careers In Science hit the stage soon after, and I feel redundant reviewing them AGAIN but I just have to show them more love, because they deserve it!
Fortunately they had a new song which I decided to focus this piece on. And guess what: IT IS MY FAVOURITE SONG YET.
For serious. It was really fucking good. And I can't wait to hear it again because I only have my notes to go by (I was really drunk).
Did I mention they all had superhero shirts on?
Because that's fucking bAd AsS.
AND even the bartenders were rocking out to them.
AND I believe for the first time the bassist was free to mosey around the stage AND through the crowd while playing, and boy did he seem to enjoy himself. And I enjoyed it to. And so did everyone else. Even his dad, who I met!
They even had the singer of Drugs In Japan join them on stage for a song.
Killer set buddiez!
Now check out a really short clip I made:

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY#2: Needles//Pins @ Parts & Labour

NEEDLES//PINS were definitely (one of - shout out to Careers In Science!) the highlight(s) of my Thursday night.
Hella worth traveling down to P&L for despite many awesome shows way closer.
And despite being drunk as a skunk riding a bike.
They are the perfect mix of pop, punk and surf vibes and end up being MAD engaging for a threesome. Even more so with tits on the drums!
I'd theeesome that shizzz.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY#2: Hooded Fang @ The Horseshoe

Wow. I thought Hooded Fang were good on album, but HOT DIGGITY DAMN they're like a million times better than that live.
By far one of the most fun performances I saw at NX. Check out the video below!

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY #2: Oprahs Rabies Babies (aka The Lava and Ash) @ Annex Live

"We're Blink 182" ........ "FART!"

I almost don't feel like it's necessary to write anything else for this review.
Hilarious banter as such is basically enough for me to want to go see this band, and it SHOULD be enough for you... if you like jokes that is.
Oprahs Rabies Babies (or otherwise known as The Lava and Ash) performed at Annex Live on Thursday and despite the small crowd - I don't think many people are used to going to shows at this venue yet, and the set time was listed as 3 hours and 45 minutes later than it ended up being - pretty much curb stomped the face off of NXNE.
Blood, sweat and bone(rs) were metaphorically splattered all over stage during the performance, and it was the best rockmunition to get me going for the rest of the night.
I have a video that is much shittier than I had hoped it would be, but I may be able to salvage some of it yet. In the meantime, check out some terrible pictureseses. (my crappy camera apologizes).



I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY #1: Sacred Balance @ El Mocambo (downstairs)

I don't know what happened here. I am thinking that the excessive amount of liquor pumping through my veins at the time is to blame, but I absolutely could not pay attention to Sacred Balance when they hit the stage at El Mocambo on Wednesday of NXNE.
To be fair, it was late in the night and I had already seen 4 bands and probably had double that in drinks. And those drinks themselves were doubles.
And I had relocated to the back of the venue - by the bar, obviously - and met up with some people from work who were most definitely not paying attention to the stage.
BUT I was trying. I really was. I had made note of the band when I first heard them on the NXNE site and fell in love with their bandcamp.

Somehow the live performance just did NOT compete with what I heard online for them.
It must have been me. I'm listening to their bandcamp now and loving it again.
BLASTED LIQUOR! Look what you do to me.
Still, check them out. Maybe limit yourself to singles if you see them live.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY #1: South of France @ El Mocambo (upstairs)

I'm not quite sure what happened or why, but one of my most anticipated acts of NXNE just didn't end up playing at the El Mocambo at the time they were listed to.
They are South of France and I was really looking forward to their upbeat indie beach pop the first night of the festival.

Disappointed, I was when they just didn't end up on stage and these two acoustic dudes took their place.
And what's worse is that I couldn't even TRY to enjoy whoever these guys were because of two (but mostly one) idiot slut(s) who kept trying to drag all these guys up towards the stage to dance, acting as if she were really the whore that she LOOKED like in order to gather all these pathetic guys around the stage to feign fans for her (I'm assuming here) boyfriend with the guitar.
If this duo ever stumbles upon this review please note that THESE GIRLS RUINED YOUR SHOW FOR YOU. I would have probably liked your cute acoustic folky pop if it weren't for your dumb whores. LOSE THE CUNTS AND GET BETTER REVIEWS!
That is all.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY #1: Gus + Scout @ El Mocambo (downstairs)

Gus + Scout were dicks down the BEST discovery of this years NXNE.
And this is way before I figured out that Scout is related to Bruce Willis.
Unlike the last band I saw/wrote about, the nervous stage presence really really worked for Gus + Scout, and it added to their enticing personas.
They were, by far, the coolest duo I've ever seen on a stage together.
And I'm not forgetting their bassist and drummer who, although aren't included in the Gus + Scout, still helped to make the group and performance so perfectly awesome by rocking the fuck out to music I never expected to feature such rock outs.
Back to Gus + Scout...
Imagine if Syd & Nancy and Johnny & June Carter Cash 's spirits all morphed together in heaven / hell / wherever they are and decided to take over the current bodies of The XX, with some Janis Joplin influence somewhere in there.
The final product would be G + S.
The pair sang so wonderfully that I was - no word of a lie - close to tears their whole performance.
I haven't stopped listening to the 3 songs up on their bandcamp since that beautiful night.
And I'm yet to be sick of any of them.

They covered the song "Da Doo Ron Ron" by The Crystals live and slowed it down, stripped it of the 'da doo ron ron'ness of the original and made it incredibly sultry and endearing. In my opinion they deserved a thousand more claps and cheers than the audience allotted them that night.
Again, THE best discovery of NXNE 2012.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

NXNE DAY #1: Your Neck of the Woods @ The Piston

I just discovered Your Neck of the Woods when I was preparing my day 1 schedule. I was drawn to the fun, twangy, sway-worthy folk/bluegrass meets pop style sound and decided to catch them at The Piston to kick off the week.
Any band that consists of banjo, stand up bass, violin, mandolin, washboard and cowbell are worth a listen in my books.
Unfortunately they were lacking a banjo player, which was a shame, but nothing TOO detrimental to the performance.
What I did find somewhat harmful was the extremely awkward stage banter.
Granted, the band looks fairly young AND it was NXNE which would make many seasoned artists nervous, but I'd almost rather not hear any talking than hear the cringe-worthy back and forth blunder that went on.
AND the tuning was absolutely ridiculous. I get tuning on stage to an extent, but this was borderline unprepared, and it's a short set at a huge festival so like, get your shit together!
That said, their music made up for these annoyances. Including the fact that it was at one of the most terrible venues - aside from Painted Lady - that is just unequipped space-wise to have shows. I get so grumpy every time I step in there, and it was really hard to stick around until the end of the set with all these band dudes who thought they were so cool (who played later that night I'm assuming) pushing by and in front of me the entire set without any respect towards the band playing. One dude was wearing the most disgusting outfit of douchey suspenders and I just wanted to punch him. If anybody saw the bands following YNOTW and recognize who I'm talking about let me know so I can make fun of the band for him being such a douche. Because he was. I remember him far more than I remember the band, unfortunately. His fault not theirs. BUT like I said the music was good enough to keep me almost until the end, I think I only missed like half a song.
The girl has an incredible voice, and they reminded me of a way-more-blue-grass-y Old Man Markley, who I LOVE.
I enjoyed the violin solo the most.
And the fact that they admitted to needing to work on their stage banter before playing a killer dance number.
In the end all is forgiven.
But remember what your parents used to tell you: If you can't say anything interesting, don't say anything at all.

What, your parents didn't tell you that?
Oh.... I see how it is mom and dad.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

The Black Frame Spectacle

There's nothing worse for me than a band that is neither great nor terrible.
The Black Frame Spectacle isn't the type of band you'd find falling from your ass into the toilet, but they aren't one that you'd find exploding from your junk either.
I listened to them yesterday in order to review them but for the life of me couldn't concentrate on them enough to write a single word.
I'm having the exact same problem today.
I don't hate them, which would have made it much easier because I'm awesome at being an asshole.
I don't love them either though. Although some tracks like #7 (see below) are totally growing on me.

It says on their FB that they are a band like no other, but I find the opposite true.
I think their sound is all too familiar... it's that almost-rockabilly almost-punk, mostly-rock and a lotta-alternative type of music that's at the Bovine every weekend.

I'm Sarah

Hot Chip ... hot diggity, dog ziggity, boom, what'cha do to me!

Ostensibly the new Hot Chip album cover for In Our Heads is just a bunch of lines forming odd shapes around various colours, most of which resemble Pac-Man trapped in a bailing press.
However, when you hear the substance behind the art the shapes start to move along to the music and take on new meaning, revealing its true foreshadowing purpose.
I can see it all now.
Each shape is a person crammed onto a sweaty dance floor.
Each colour represents the type of E that person is on.
Or, in a PG13 rated world or under it's the colours reflecting off of the disco ball.
Either way, this image fully represents the mood and style you're to expect from this album.
Epic upbeat pop party anthems infected heavily with 80's and 90's swagger. Songs drunk off disco beats and flying colours, sung by big hair'd bobble heads with necks made specifically for spinning and swaying, all the while screaming "YES" in motion.
It's enough to melt your face off.
I'm imagining an alternate ending to Face/Off, where both Nicolas and John get burned in a fire but it's OK because the fire is Hot Chip, and it feels good to die to disco.


I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

CoOl NeW mUsIc YaLl

Oh yes check it k see yes. check its. out.s I Sarah Sarah. Wherever I be, I Be.

Dog Vomit + Horse Crap

Well this was the absolute LAST thing I want to hear right now, and probably ever.
Maybe I'm just in a sour mood towards all this cutesy sounding crap right now but all I can think of is dog vomit after eating horse crap. Yum.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Thousand Young

Thousand Young are the peanut brittle of grunge punk.
Dark outside, crunchy inside, gets stuck in your ear-teeth, melts all over your face, and remains delicious throughout. Not to mention once you introduce your ear-buds to the taste of the music you'll never stop craving it. Unless you have too much that you puke... but ears can't throw up can they? Unless their vomit is made out of wax.. in which case, it would probably just make everything sound and feel better.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.