I saw this band the day I got back from Pouzza Fest and I'm JUST reviewing them now.
Since it's clearly a little late for a show review I might as well just 'review' the demo they have up while I'm at it.
But first of all, *backtrack* .. if you want to know how good they are live it can be summed up by what I went through the night I saw them...

After a 5 day vacation that included traveling to Pouzza, partying very hard, and taking the uncomfortable train back to Toronto after very little sleep just to nap for less than 30 minutes, shower and then bike my ass down to see yet ANOTHER show...

Fast forward to after their set when it immediately started pouring and storming on me as I biked home, soaking me and giving me my third shower of the day ... and I HATE showers....

You feel me?

Now, as far as the tetrad of songs they have up on their bandcamp...
They are an impressive collection of melodic backwoods punk rock, full of beer soaked, boy-thick singalongs that would make any lumberjack Priest cream his pants.

It's always a bit awkward to review bands that I'm friends with.. but if it's good then it's fucking good and it deserves to be talked about whether we're friends or not.
And this is fucking good!
So good, in fact, that I've been listening to it on repeat for the better part of my afternoon in order to learn all the words so I can shout along the next time I see them live.
Because I'm a nerd like that.
And because each time I listen to it I feel like they're just begging me to sing with them.
Like, reaching their hands out of the speakers towards my throat... not in a I'm-going-to-strangle-you-to-death sort of way, but in a I'm-going-to-strangle-you-with-awesome pleading sort of way!

Check them out:

Stole this from their FACEBOOK - done by Savannah Parent

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Are you brave enough to listen to the new Careers In Science EP, COWARDS?

Holy new Careers In Science!
Talk about finding your niche!
I've been listening to these guys for years now and I have to say... this new EP, Cowards, definitely sounds like they've found Cinderella's foot to slip into the shoe they've been shoe-sitting for so long.
SHOE OF ROCK, that is. Or isn't...... or IS.
They've grown stronger, harder, and even a wee bit crazier.
And it fits. The shoe fits. And it smells AWESOME.
I may have heard the EP live a couple times already, but the beautiful thing about liquor is that you can experience things for the first time many many times over as long as every time you experience you've had enough to drink. And in my case I ALWAYS have enough to drink, so listening to it again right now feels just like I'm falling for the first time... again. Barenaked.
And it actually has gotten me thinking... a lot... about what I'm afraid of...
The answer is puppets.
And mascots.
For realz.
I'm totally terrified of that shit.
Pupaphobia is a real bitch.
Anyway, just the fact that it got me thinking is a huge deal. I don't really like thinking that much, and I choose to turn off my fears for the most part.
Which I believe makes me more of a coward? To run away from the things you're scared of...
It's actually a really interesting concept to me. Especially for an album.
It reminds me of that animal character in that movie... you know, with the witches, and the midgets, I mean munchkins... and the animal is a coward... what's it called again??? Oh yeah, The Wizard Of Oz!
Taken from the Cowardly Lion Wikipedia...(gosh I love the Interweb):
Since lions are supposed to be "The Kings of Beasts," the Cowardly Lion believes that his fear makes him inadequate. He does not understand that courage means acting in the face of fear, which he does frequently. Only during the aftereffects of the Wizard's gift, when he is under the influence of an unknown liquid substance that the Wizard orders him to drink (perhaps gin) is he not filled with fear. He argues that the courage from the Wizard is only temporary, although he continues to do brave deeds while openly and embarrassedly fearful.
So I guess the moral of the story is that gin = liquid courage.
Something I was already well aware of....
Half the reason I drink is so I can grow some balls and network with people, because I'm a shy awkward fuck in real life.
But also, the REAL moral of the story is that we're all scared of something, but life means facing your fears and living in spite of them.
I actually talked to the band about all this when I interviewed them at Pouzza... so check that out, you might learn something!
AND check out the new EP on June 4th. Unless you're.... scared!?

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

So, you sacked the cocky khaki Kicky Sack sock plucker?

 Welcome to my sappy sad sack update that I feel I have to write as I sit here watching every other media source pump out review after review and interview after interview from POUZZAFEST.
The Sarah Curse struck again, of course.
That's all I'm going to say for now because there's still a good chance *hopefully* that it will all work out, but things are at a stand still until I have time this weekend.
Apologies to both the Deforesters and Careers In Science for not writing your reviews in the meantime, but The Sarah Curse has me about as stressed as a chicken with an egg stuck in its butt, or wherever eggs come from.
And finding the motivation right now is super hard. I'm at the point where I ALMOST considered just giving up, but I'm not a quitter, except for that time I quit gymnastics, soccer, guitar lessons, baseball... well I didn't really QUIT baseball, I retired after 8 years of playing when we finally won A Champs.
Is that retiring or just quitting on a high note?
Whatever. I'm just going to listen to this song over and over with everything on my body crossed that I can possibly cross, including my tits, and hope to fuck everything works out.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

The Class Assassins! Not to be confused with The ASS ASSASSINS!

The apple of the Toronto punk scene's eye, The Class Assassins, have just released this wacky new single that isn't really a single at all, but a double, as in 2 songs, that together make up a single.
It defies all mathematical logic, but sounds really good.
Part 1 is called "The Addiction", and part 2 "The Solution", and both are pretty politically driven so you should probably pay close attention to the lyrics. Luckily, "The Addiction" is only 4 minutes long while "The Solution" is 9 crazy minutes, which leads me to believe that there's a really good chance at kicking the addictions' ASS.

Speaking of Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood, I have to say it ties in nicely with this/these? single(s). The songs are total 'brotherhood' anthem types, with tons of singalong parts and a bottom line that the singer sums up quite nicely here, "We’re the solution if we all stand together and fight for what’s right. Make your voice be heard!”.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

The Review That Almost Never Was!

I was just about to close my MSB inbox and not open it again until after Pouzza. I have an insane amount of interviews to write before the festival and barely any time to do them, so I decided to ignore everything and everything until like, June, at least. But then I saw an email from a band called Crooked Jacks and I immediately pictured Jack Bauer finally turning to the dark side, like along with Vader, and turning on his country and in turn becoming the terrorist he fought so honourably against for so many seasons. That dumb image in my head, and because the dude in the email complimented my writing style, made me decide to talk about this one last album before I go MIA.
Okay, that and because the guy basically described his band in the way that I would probably have described it anyway in the email, therefore doing like 90% of my work for me because we all know that these reviews include ONE line actually talking about the album, and everything else is just dumb shit like the whole Jack Bauer thing above, or food talk, or sex talk.
Anyway, here's what HE said about it:
We are a fucky mix of punk and country punk, best described as the bastard child of Mike Ness and Ben Weasel, with a pinch of Broadways thrown in for good measure.
So I don't have to do shit, other than agree!
I kid.
I'll at least throw in an obscure reference.
They remind me of that movie Dudes, when Jon Cryer's character and his friend Biscuit have to exchange their punk clothes for country outfits so that they don't stick out as they hunt down the douchebags who killed Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
Now compare:
Nah, probably not. But whatever. All I'm trying to say here is that I can definitely hear the punk + country blend when I listen to Crooked Jacks, and it sounds about as badass as those DUDES (heh) look. Or are supposed to look, back in the day.
I honestly fucking love it.
This album will probably be on repeat for the rest of the day.
The speed, the vocals, the everything... so good it makes my ears drool. If I were to rate how much I love it on a scale of flaccid to boner I'd say I'm hard enough that you could use my pretend cock as a bat in the Major Leagues to hit balls all over parks everywhurrr.

And I've just been informed that these guys will be playing Pouzza, AND since he used a Trailer Park Boys reference while informing me of this I've decided I will be interviewing the shit out of them there. So stay tuned for that.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Dudes and Dudettes, major-league butt-kicking is back in town.

And I am not talking about the latest TV show, although I actually do find it quite enjoyable, in a 'I'll-take-what-I-can-get-and-it-makes-me-giggle-sometimes' sort of way.
THIS TIME the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are taking on Shredder in the form of a fucking awesome punk rock album.
Annnd the 12 year old boy in me just got his first wet dream. Humminah, humminah.
Between my serious hard on for the genre and my passion for anything TMNT, The BCASA's album Fuck You Shredder automatically tugs on my heart-boner strings after just a glance at each Turtle related track title.
Though I've heard and seen The BCASA before and therefore know I love them, I admit I was slightly nervous as I hit play that the music itself would not measure up to the legend that is the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
But, of course, The BCASA killed it, immediately tugging away on my ear-boner strings to complete the boner marionette.
It's awesome.
It's bodacious.
It's bitchin'.
It's gnarly.
It's radical.
It's totally tubular, dude.
It's wicked.
It's hellacious.
You could even say it's one SHELL of an album.
Their garage-punk (or should I say SEWER-PUNK) sound actually seems to embrace the qualities of each Turtle:
It has Leo's strength
Raphael's tough badass'ery
Donatello's wit and brilliance
and of course, probably the most similarities to Michaelangelo's fun, party attitude.
I really want to tell you more about each song because they tell many a turtle'y story, but I don't want to give too much away. The album feels exactly like the comic/movie/TV series, and you need to experience the plot of each song on your own.
That said, buy the damn thing when it comes out on June 18th!
Nerd punk is the new skate punk.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Real life is a shit sandwich and every day you gotta take another bite.

But at least you can douse that sandwich in hot sauce and mayonnaise to add some succulency to the shit.
Today, the hot sauce I speak of is the band Foxygen, and the mayo is their album Take the Kids Off Broadway (Breakfast Horse). Each track off the album is a thick slice of roast mother fucking beef, and I guarantee you if you throw on this album first thing this Friday morning life won't even taste like a rotten bag of hangover poop anymore. You'll forget the fact that you're too broke to go to a birthday party at Yuk Yuks with all your friends on a Friday night and will end up watching a really crappy downloaded version of the new Evil Dead at home instead.
Pshaw. It's all good in the hood when you are listening to Foxygen.
What I love the most about this psychedelic rock 'n' roll band is that they don't just SOUND like the Rolling Stones or any other 60's/70's legendary band of the sort, but they sound like they were literally BIRTHED by them, out of the butts of their guitars and drums, like a chicken laying it's eggs (I'm sure eggs don't come out of a chickens butt, right? but for the sake of this sentence they do).. making them blood relatives. Or something. Seriously though they sound like they belong in that era, and the more I think about it / hear it, the more I believe that they are actually time travelers, somehow. They found the warp whistle. They've skipped ahead to level 2000.
I'm fucking on to them.
Come have your mind blown at their live show in Toronto next Thursday. EVENT HERE.

OR just listen to them here:

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

Welcome to another edition of FOODSHEBLOGGED

I should re-write that Korn song "A.D.I.D.A.S." so that it's "A.D.I.D.A.F." ... all day I dream about FOOD.
Not fucking. Well, actually yeah fucking. So either way works.
Seriously. I'm such a fucking fatty. I can barely even hear the Buddy Black album that I'm trying to review over my insatiable craving for DUFF'S WINGS.

Holy fuckamoly.
My credit card is going to take a pound(of wings)ing tonight that's for sure. If there's enough on it. hashtagBrokeAssBroke.
Um, right, review.
See here's the thing about reviewing somebody you know and like and fully support. It can get about as messy as wings, and I always end up with sauce all over my face.
Whatever that means.
Case in point: the album Adversary Avenue by Buddy Black.
Don't get me wrong, in no way shape or form am I saying I dislike it. If it were a Facebook status I'd thumbs up the shit out of it, more than once if I could. I'd unlike it JUST so I could like it again.
But I'm used to seeing Buddy live. And I reeeeally like seeing Buddy live. And listening to Buddy live. He is such a cool cat that it adds so much to his music and turns his performance from just a dude on stage with a guitar singing songs to something way more special than that.
The problem with the album is you can't fully experience Buddy while listening to it.
Maybe my ears are just being jerks because I'm hungover and hungry, but I just can't seem to get as into the songs on CD.
And I love them live SO MUCH.
I'm not sure if it's something to do with the recording itself, but the first few songs definitely pale in comparison to hearing them at a show.
It took me until track 5 before the album really started to catch my attention.
From there on I got into it, toe-tappin' all over the damn place to his Pogues meets Bright Eyes fucked up fusion of celtic folky almost-punk-but-not-quite-punk rock, loving his crazy unique worked-up-Cookie Monster sounding vocals.
ALAS, it failed to live up to my expectations simply because Buddy sets that bar way too high when he's on stage.
It did, however, make me very excited to go see him again.

I'm Sarah. I do what I want.

"This next one is a dick boiler" - The Satans

I wrote this review in my head on my way home from the Bovine, between comparing my bike ride to Mario Kart (I will never again in my life share that link with anybody, it's the worst of my worst) and coming to the realization that I'm a robot.

I went with no intention of reviewing the show but I just couldn't help myself. Seriously, I am a robot.
To be fair though, The Satans actually had me enjoying a ROCKABILLY set, and I am far from a fan of the genre on a normal basis, so that in itself demanded some blog attention.
I guess they were more psychobilly than rockabilly, or maybe JUST psycho. The psycho'er the better'er, though, and on a scale of flaccid to boner my metaphorical dick grew three sizes in the span of one set, and by the end had blown its load all over the Bovine floor, which just ended up looking like snow.
It was fucking fierce. And I don't mean that in the 'Project Runway' kind of way, I mean 'fierce' like it's supposed to be meant:
Adjective: Having or displaying an intense or ferocious aggressiveness.
Showing a heartfelt and powerful intensity.
ferocious - violent - savage - furious - wild - truculent
I had my heart set on comparing the show to Cannibal Holocaust, but in typical Sarah fashion I drank too much and by the time I got home I had completely forgotten WHY I was going to compare the two. It can't be because of the creepy makeup The Satans sport, because they didn't have makeup in the movie... It can't be because of the singer wearing a cape, because Cannibal Holocaust ain't no Batman (unfortunately)... It can't be because the guitarist was wearing a dress... because I don't think they wear much of anything in the movie... maybe it was the way he was awesomely accosting the audience as they walked in the door, propelling himself through the crowd and then doubling back to the stage like he was chained up and couldn't actually reach anybody in order to eat them... like that thing in Super Mario...
Orrrr maybe it was just because the band brutally murdered my eardrums, and totally raped my distaste for that sort of music, giving me Stockholm syndrome so that in the end I was actually in love with them.
Who the fuck knows why I wanted to compare the two. Only past soberer Sarah does I guess, and she's dead.

I'm Sarah. Live fast, diarrhea.