"It's times like this I wish I had a penis" - Duckman (Private Dick/Family Man)

I hear ya (duck)man!
I'm 30 seconds into the first track off the new Tight Nuns album and I've already blown my faux-load 30 times.
It totally reminds me of a much faster, more aggressive Dillinger Four...who are one of my favourite bands of all time.
And judging by the way they titled the album, P U N K D E B U R E A U (similar to C I V I L W A R by Dillinger Four) and track #6 "Yousaydrumandbassithinkdeathfromabove1979" (similar to a few songs by D4 with the altogethernessofthewords) this comparison was both acknowledged and maybe even deliberate....
Which puts this album in the running for my favourite album of 2013.
I'm a handful of songs in now and it's just been a consta-gasm so far.. maybe it's a good thing I don't really have a penis or my desk would be mighty messy,  I'd probably get stuck to it just trying to type this review!


It's 'unbelieverable' (not my joke, actually a song title from this album, lols) that these songs were made by only THREE PEOPLE... they sound about as full bodied as Rita MacNeil (nottoosoon)... and the vocals, holy hell, I don't even know how to explain how much I love them without being dirty, because that's the only way I can express myself apparently...so here goes: I love them about as much as a straight man who has been in solitary confinement for years would love the feel of his jizz pump entering a woman's nether lips after his forced period of celibacy.
This band has always been amazing to see live, but hearing this new album has just skyrocketed them onto the planet of epic punk bands who will never be forgotten no matter what happens to them after this.
I can honestly picture myself listening to this 15 years from now, just like I still listen to Midwestern Songs of the Americas by D4 almost daily.
Huge shout out to my hero, Ian Blurton, for the fucking amazing job he did recording and producing this album for them. No wonder it's so fucking killer, although these songs could have been recorded on a shitty cell phone and they'd still rock hard cocks.
On a scale of flaccid to boner, P U N K D E B U R E A U has my imaginary bald-headed yogurt slinger standing at full attention, making it rain probiotic liquids so fast and hard that it causes Toronto to flood all over again.
Yep, totally my favourite album of 2013. Dicks up.

Hear for yourself:

And come to the record release show on July 26th at The Amsterdam Bicycle Club (Toronto).



I'm Sarah, with an 'h' (only Tight Nuns will get that *wink*)